The NFL's most tedious stories
Also, a beer bracket winner and crowned and we're making the case to abolish the Chargers
It’s been almost a year since I last covered the NFL for a living. Despite its positives — getting paid to write/edit about football every day, having a “stable” job — only in rare moments of nostalgia do I actually miss the day-to-day work. The grind of the news cycle and the increasing lack of help were a recipe for burnout, one way or the other.
Here at the Post Route, we write about whatever’s on our mind and we hope you’ll find it interesting too. The best part is that we can completely ignore some breaking news if we want. That’s what I don’t miss about my old job most of all. Either out of an obligation to our readers or direction from our bosses, we’d have to cover certain events that we’d all absolutely dread.
This past week, there have been three types of stories making headlines that’d fit that criteria, for different reasons. So it’s kind of ironic that I’m now going to write about them — on my own terms.
1. The player who finds himself in legal trouble
Throughout the years, we’ve seen quite a few NFL players get arrested or face serious accusations. Deshaun Watson, who as of right now has 21 lawsuits filed against him, is the latest.
There aren’t many immediate facts in this case, though I’m sure you’ve probably already seen a lot of speculation since when we have access to practically everyone’s thoughts all the time now and too many people think they’ll fade away like the photo of the McFly siblings if they don’t weigh in on everything. And while I understand it’s human nature to wonder why Watson’s had that many masseuses or what the deal is with the accusers’ lawyer, it’s not responsible when we have limited knowledge of the situation. Otherwise, it can lead to clumsy, sometimes biased writing.
Steph Stradley, who has a legal background and has also covered the Texans, put together a FAQ about Watson’s lawsuits that I’d recommend reading because she understands how to properly write about this incident. A snippet:
“The stance of “believe women” means when discussing and investigating a situation, the default stance should be to believe accounts on their face and treat them with care and seriousness.
Historically and currently, that is not always the situation. It is good for society to encourage reporting of abuse and starting with a stance of care and belief and following the evidence. Much preferable over cynically picking a side and filtering everything through preconceived views that may be completely wrong.
The stance of keeping an open mind and letting facts play out is also important to society as a whole. It is good for society for everyone to be fully heard and not to have situations where accused people are presumed guilty without a fair process and accounting of events.”
Waiting and not assuming anything can be difficult, but it’s vital to these kinds of stories. Be smart, be careful, and stick to the facts, even if there are few.
2. The baseless trashing of a draft prospect’s reputation
I’ve already complained about the annual ritual of bad QB draft takes. Now we’ve reached the unfortunate stage where an anonymous source can crap all over a prospect via a member of the media:
Dan Orlovsky tried to walk it back, and Kirk Herbstreit appropriately dragged him for it:
Even if he was just answering a question about why Justin Fields could be falling in the draft, and even if Orlovsky personally is high on Fields’ talent, it was still irresponsible of him to put that out there, especially when he didn’t investigate the claims until after he already passed them along.
First of all, there’s plenty of readily available evidence that contradicts what his source said. Fields, who was voted a team captain, publicly campaigned to have a season last year when he could’ve not played and been drafted No. 2. His commitment to football has been so great that he adopted a vegan diet, took exclusively online classes even before the pandemic, and played through a painful hip injury in the College Football Playoff semifinal and national championship game.
I also follow Ohio State football very closely and have never heard anything, publicly or privately, to suggest there’s even a kernel of truth to this.
Maybe whoever told that BS to Orlovsky did so in hopes that Fields would drop to their team in the draft. Whatever the reason, it’s not fair to Fields or any other prospect who has to endure specious criticism from men hiding behind their anonymity. The biggest victim of it last year was Justin Herbert, who faced endless questions about his leadership and confidence before the draft. I don’t think anyone’s wondering if Herbert, the reigning NFL Offensive Rookie of the Year, has what it takes anymore.
Why does this still happen, year after year? Please, just stop letting these unnamed sources have a voice.
3. Rule change proposals
Every spring, the NFL owners vote on rule change proposals submitted by teams and the competition committee. And every spring, we get excited about the prospects of some cool new rule and start imagining what it would look like in a game situation. What if teams have the option of one fourth-and-15 play instead of an onside kick?! Patrick Mahomes would complete that, what, 75 percent of the time? And how badly would the Jets screw it up?
Then, the rule proposal isn’t passed and the ones that do get approved are all pretty minor, leaving us all disappointed.
Let’s just save the new rules talk until after the owners vote. Then we won’t get our hopes up about a change in jersey numbers that might never come. — SH
It’s Time to Abolish the Chargers
The Chargers, specifically owner Dean Spanos, are in the worst kind of trouble for an NFL team. Worse than quarterback purgatory. Worse than salary cap hell.
The Chargers got money trouble.
NFL teams are no small investment. Even the crappiest franchise is worth at least a billion dollars, probably more with the latest round of TV deals. So, buying and owning one of these things is not something for the middle tier of the 1 Percent. Unfortunately, the NFL has a couple teams still owned by lesser rich people, namely the Raiders, who are owned by a man-child whose mom still cuts his hair and can be found on cheap wing night at Hooters, and the Chargers.
Money problems for the Raiders have been mitigated to some extent by their move to Las Vegas. The league tried to prop the Chargers up by making them live on Stan Kroenke’s couch in Los Angeles, after the city of San Diego wisely said no to keeping the Spanos family on the public dole.
That precipitated the ugly relocation saga, the low point of which might have been the team’s inability to draw more than 3,000 fans to a soccer stadium. Chargers games will still be a sad affair when drunk fans are finally allowed this season to return to NFL stadiums, get publicly intoxicated and vomit on someone in the stands who also spent $1,000 to take their family to a game. Home games for the Chargers are mostly the chance for out-of-town fans of the visiting team to see their preferred franchise play a game.
Now comes news of an internal spat within the Spanos family. Their football is a drain on the trust that keeps multiple generations of Spanoses (Spani?) from having to lift a finger while enjoying a lifestyle increasingly out of reach to Americans who weren’t already born with a trust fund of their own.
Nothing in the world is uglier than when rich family members fight over money. Whereas my family or yours might resolve disputes over who gets dad’s table saw and hunting rifle by running away with said item in the night or drunken fisticuffs that result in the younger members of their respective broods melting down into tears while the older ones giggle and your uncle’s latest girlfriend threatens to jump in and stomp someone’s ass (which she is definitely not sober enough to do). Rich families duke it out with lawyers, and they don’t quit. They’ll burn up as much of that trust fund as the toxic asset they’re fighting over does.
And make no mistake, the Chargers are a toxic asset. They are an unloved used washing machine that someone left in the yard.
The only way to resolve this is to completely erase the Chargers. Make Spanos sell the team—he obviously can’t run it anyway. Then, move it. Find another city (Salt Lake? Portland? Some place in the other Carolina, the one that doesn’t have the Panthers? St. Louis? HAHAHA no.)
Against all odds, the Chargers have the nucleus of a good NFL team. This wouldn’t be like grafting an expansion franchise onto an indifferent city. But they’d have to be rebranded, an all new franchise. The Chargers as we know them can live on in the back pages of the record books, a team that once existed but no longer does, like the Whalers or the Thrashers (the NHL is actually very good at repurposing it’s unloved expansion teams.)
Until this happens, the Chargers are doomed to never be more than an NFL team that is actually something slightly less than a whole franchise. I don’t believe in curses, but the Chargers just might be cursed. And until they are finally laid to rest, that hex ain’t going anywhere and the rest of the NFL will have tolerate this drag on the league’s overall health and well-being.
There is only way to solve this problem: end the Chargers. —RVB
Crowning a Beer Bracket (and NCAA) champion
This year’s Beer Bracket was, if not accurate or especially useful, at least bold.
Our brewery-based system for picking winners at the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament only got three of the real world’s Sweet Sixteen teams correct. It didn’t get a single Elite Eight program right. It’s fully exhausted its minimal usefulness as a predictive pool with one weekend of games looming.
But hell, we’re gonna stick it out and see which upper crust college basketball program has the best local suds scene. Our brewery bracket picked a Final Four where the highest seed was dubbed college basketball’s 26th-best team by the Selection Committee, which is awesome. It also picked a Final Four featuring two different teams from the state of Connecticut, which is not. Here’s what we’re looking at with a national championship on the line:
Wichita State (11th seed, lost to Drake in the First Four)
Brewery: Central Standard Brewing
Central Standard knocked off Kansas rival (and former Beer Bracket champ) Free State to advance to the Sweet Sixteen. Its Cinderella run continues today thanks to beers like Style Points (an imperial IPA) and Peach Contrails (a wild ale).
Hartford (16th seed, lost to Baylor in the opening round)
Brewery: New Park Brewing
New England is the epicenter of hazy IPAs and highly-rated local breweries. You could make a pretty damn good bracket with just Connecticut-Massachusetts-Vermont companies alone. Hartford is having its best year since the Vin Baker days.
Loyola Chicago (8th seed, lost to Oregon State in the Sweet Sixteen)
Brewery: Revolution Brewing
If there’s one Final Four brewery you’ve probably heard of, it’s Revolution. The Chicago standout has carved its way through a crowded market thanks to a combination of crushable IPAs and heavier dark beers. Revolution rarely misses, and as far as craft beer goes it’s remained relatively affordable.
UConn (7th seed, lost to Maryland in the opening round)
Brewery: Willlimantic Brewing Co.
See what I mean about New England? It helps there are plenty of beer snobs ready to go deep on a review online. To no one’s surprise, three of their top five brews are IPAs — but with a highly-rated barleywine and stout in their portfolio, Willimantic isn’t a one-trick pony.
And here’s how they turned out:
Willimantic got a tough draw and New Park fought to the last man, but in the end Revolution was an unstoppable juggernaut loaded with a vast array of beloved brews. If only things had worked out so well for Cameron Krutwig (damn you, Oregon State’s smothering defense and the Ramblers’ borderline impressive inability to make threes).
So what about the *real* (well, real-er) Final Four? Here’s how those four programs and their local breweries stack up:
Good news, Houston fans. You bludgeoned the competition. Getting paired up against Bare Arms gave St. Arnold an effective bye week vs. the worst brewery in the bracket. UCLA’s Angel City didn’t fare much better in the title game. The Beer Bracket says pick underdogs this weekend, but past results suggest you should fade those suggestions and go chalk through your Final Four — and maybe even kick the tires on a Baylor championship.
Thanks for following along with another deep dive into brewery bracket-ry. Hope you guys enjoyed reading it as much as I liked writing it. — CD