The 5 "bad vibes" teams of the NFL preseason
Several teams have had a really strange month. Will it be a distant memory once the season begins, or a harbinger of what's to come?
The preseason is winding down — thankfully. I say that not because I want real football to begin (though I do), but because this preseason has been pretty brutal.
Sometimes literally:
A number of young players have already suffered season-ending injuries, including Jets tackle Mekhi Becton, Giants receiver Collin Johnson, Panthers quarterback Matt Corral, and Colts punter Rigoberto Sanchez. Several big names may have avoided a major setback but might not be ready for Week 1, like Shaquille (formerly Darius) Leonard, Kayvon Thibodeaux, Zach Wilson, and Jason Kelce.
Then there are the “unusual” maladies we’ve seen, such as Joe Burrow’s appendectomy, Ken Walker’s hernia surgery, Blake Bell’s hip flexor injury, and whatever bug is ripping through the Dolphins’ locker room.
Injuries are always a part of the game and they’re always a bummer. Still, it feels like the universe is just pouring it on certain teams that are already dealing with other mishaps since training camp began.
Or, in other words, these teams are dripping in bad vibes this preseason. That doesn’t mean that they’ll carry this misfortune into the regular season. It doesn’t even mean these squads are destined to lose a bunch of games. After all, the Lions have great vibes, as we’re witnessing each week on Hard Knocks. That won’t necessarily translate into success once the season starts.
So which teams are giving off the weirdest energy right now? I narrowed the list down to five* and then examined what it could portend for the season ahead.
*Sorry (or congrats?) to the Jets and Seahawks for being left off. You’re supposed to suck anyway.
Dallas Cowboys
It wasn’t that long ago when the Cowboys boasted one of the strongest offensive lines and receiving corps in the NFL. In fact, it was just last year.
How quickly things can change, especially when the owner’s poor salary cap decisions come back to haunt him:
Even before losing left tackle Tyron Smith to a torn hamstring, the Dallas offensive line had a few question marks. Could Terence Steele adequately replace right tackle La’el Collins, who signed with the Bengals in free agency? Could Tyler Biadasz prove himself as the answer at center? Could first-round pick Tyler Smith shine in his rookie season?
Tyron Smith being out a few months complicates matters, as does a lack of depth and experience after him (Josh Ball, who did not play at all as a rookie, is in line to replace Smith at LT).
A similar issue is happening at wide receiver. Due to money reasons, the Cowboys traded No. 1 WR Amari Cooper to the Browns for a fifth-round pick. Cedrick Wilson is now with the Dolphins. Although Dallas signed James Washington to a team-friendly deal and drafted Jalen Tolbert, Washington is out for 6-10 weeks with a broken foot and Tolbert has struggled in the preseason. Michael Gallup, coming off a torn ACL, won’t be ready for Week 1 either.
The good news is that Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott are healthy, and CeeDee Lamb is getting there. USFL MVP KaVontae Turpin is fun too!
That might not be enough to overcome the offense’s other issues in a make-or-break year for head coach Mike McCarthy and OC Kellen Moore.
The NFC East hasn’t had a repeat champion since the early-aughts, and after Smith’s injury, the Cowboys’ odds have taken a hit. They’ll be a factor in the divisional race, but I’d be nervous about betting on them at this point.
Washington Commanders
Like their hated rival, the Commanders have been dealing with offensive line injuries, though none as impactful as Tyron Smith’s. Arguably their biggest injury news has been that star pass rusher Chase Young, who tore his ACL in November, will begin this season on the PUP list.
There have been other problems plaguing the team this offseason, however. To be honest, Washington has had nothing but bad vibes since Dan Snyder took over as team owner. And speaking of that worm, he’s recently found himself testifying in front of a congressional committee due to sexual harassment allegations and other inappropriate workplace behavior.
If you’re wondering what DC Jack Del Rio thinks about anyone testifying in front of Congress, well, I don’t know why because he’s an idiot. Earlier this summer, he deleted his Twitter account after his heinous (and poorly aged) comments about Jan. 6. Unrelated but still worth pointing out: Washington’s defense has been pretty lousy this preseason, just as it was a year ago.
The pass rush, which should be the bright spot of the defense, has been disappointing (though Young’s eventual return should help there), even after Ron Rivera canned defensive line coach Sam Mills III. It was a strangely timed firing too, coming just a couple days after Mills celebrated his dad’s posthumous induction into the Pro Football Hall of Fame.
The offense hasn’t had much to brag about, either. That’ll happen when Carson Wentz is your quarterback and panics every time he faces a third down:
And when your former RB1 (Antonio Gibson) has been relegated to kick return duties.
On the positive side, running back Brian Robinson Jr. and receiver Jahan Dotson are breakout rookie candidates, tight end Logan Thomas is inching closer to a full return, and WR1 Terry McLaurin is under contract and embodies everything the Commanders *should* be.
Anything is possible in the perpetually wide-open NFC East, but it’s not worth expecting much out of this franchise.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers
The Bucs may seem like a surprise entry on this list. A month ago, I would have agreed. Since then, center Ryan Jensen, right tackle Tristan Wirfs, and guard Aaron Stinnie all got hurt (only Wirfs’ injury appears to be minor). Tom Brady turned 45 and soon after disappeared from the team for 11 days doing who knows what (not guest starring on The Masked Singer, apparently).
In his place, Kyle Trask hasn’t exactly looked like the Bucs’ answer at QB whenever Brady actually retires, for real this time. Despite the occasional flash and support of OC Byron Leftwich (and, to be fair, with a Swiss cheese OL), Trask has had his share of miscues:
The OL issues don’t just affect the quarterback, however. The Bucs’ already-average running backs room could struggle to produce if the reconfigured line doesn’t hold its own. Like Trask, the RBs have been up and down during the preseason games (they averaged just 2.8 yards per carry against the Dolphins and then 4.2 ypc against the Titans). Leonard Fournette has been weight shamed, while Kenjon Barber and Gio Bernard have suffered injuries.
All of this might threaten to derail Brady’s triumphant unretirement season. Or, even worse, a makeshift offensive line could get the 45-year-old quarterback injured and Trask or Blaine Gabbert thrusted into a lineup.
But I know better by now. Brady, even halfway into his 40s and with a less stable OL, will be fine. And so will the Bucs. Probably, anyway.
Cleveland Browns
It was just two years ago when most of us were cheering on the lovable losers in Cleveland, who finally broke their long playoff drought and came fairly close to making it to the AFC title game.
Now they’re one of the main villains in the NFL due to a Faustian bargain this offseason. In their never-ending quest for a franchise quarterback, they shamelessly pulled out all the stops (including a fully guaranteed $230 million contract) to land Deshaun Watson, who faced more than two dozen lawsuits from women accusing him of sexual misconduct. The Browns weren’t contrite or transparent during and after the process, while Watson has offered nothing but mealy mouthed “sorry to those offended” statements.
Those actions have only embolden the worst kind of people who treat everything like it’s part of some fictional culture war:
(To be clear, I don’t believe that photo reflects the opinion of all or most of the Browns fanbase. I feel sorry for the long-suffering diehards who have stuck with this franchise through its many low moments and who are disgusted with how the Watson signing transpired.)
The Browns are built to win now with a quarterback of Watson’s football talent. Except they won’t have Watson under center until December after his 11-game suspension is over. Ostensibly, they’ll have Jacoby Brissett as the temporary starter, and he is, however you want to read into this, decidedly not Deshaun Watson:
Brissett has been useful as a backup quarterback in his career but hasn’t lit it up as QB1. That’s also been true this preseason, when he’s been outplayed by Joshua Dobbs.
Even if Brissett can hold down the fort, there’s no guarantee that Watson will pick up where he left off … two years ago. Earlier this month, Watson saw his first action since the final game of the 2020 season. It was just the preseason and he only attempted five passes (completing one of them), but he still looked, uh, rusty.
There are concerns elsewhere on offense. Despite adding Amari Cooper this offseason, the Browns’ wide receiving corps has a depth issue, particularly after slot receiver/kick returner Jakeem Grant was lost for the season. In theory, Cleveland’s offense should be able to rely on its top-rated running game. Yet that’s had its own drama, most notably Kareem Hunt requesting a trade.
I’ve often said that sports are not a morality contest. There’s no such thing as a righteous team, or karmic retribution to those that willingly employ players accused of awful acts (as the most recent example, look at the Super Bowl favorites Bills and their punter Matt Araiza, who was accused of participating in a gang rape of a minor).
The Browns will not disappoint this season simply because they “deserve” it. But they might disappoint because they are the Browns.
New England Patriots
Last offseason, the Patriots went off script when they spent big in free agency. Alas, their deviation from the norm was short-lived; this offseason, they weren’t very active.
That doesn’t have to be a bad thing, especially for a team that ranked No. 4 in overall DVOA last season. The defense seems destined to regress a bit in 2022 after it was embarrassed by the Bills in the playoffs, but so far the (mostly) young talent has stepped up this preseason.
The offense, on the other hand, has been messy:
I suppose that’s not a shocker, considering they don’t have an offensive coordinator and Matt Patricia (former DC, failed Lions coach) and Joe Judge (former ST coordinator, failed Giants coach) have, for some reason, been rotating playcalling duties. As expected, Bill Belichick has yet to offer much of an explanation.
Same with whatever is happening with Kendrick Bourne, the most recent in a long line of players to land on Belichick’s poop list. Hopefully that situation works itself out because the Pats can’t afford to lose any other receivers, not after trading N’Keal Harry and losing rookie Tyquan Thornton to a collarbone injury. Running back James White, who did the bulk of his work catching passes out of the backfield, also retired a couple weeks ago.
A lot is riding on Mac Jones, who is trying to build off his promising rookie season with another step forward. A shaky offensive line makes that task much more difficult.
Judging by their playoff performance and their lack of moves this offseason, I’m not sure the Patriots have what it takes to compete with the Bills in the AFC East. And while Belichick has earned the benefit of the doubt, it’s easy to picture New England falling off a bit this year.